Remember back in the day when the bad boys always got the good girls–and the bad ones too–while the rest (including you) were left wondering if joining the Lacrosse team would earn you a girl? It didn’t matter if you did, for as long as you still didn’t have the X-factor, you’d never figure out how get a girl to like you.
A lot must have changed since then, you may have been short and dowdy back then, but neither the beard you’ve grown, nor the 3 feet you’ve since gained have done much in changing your ill fate. What are you missing?
It wouldn’t matter if you made dunking look like a meager stretch back then, or if your Monday to Monday designer wear is regularly steamed and pressed; if you don’t have what it takes, then you won’t be taking her home!